Are you singing the seasonal allergies blues? Contact Argus@ArgusHamilton.com for more information. We thank you. Meet the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." Become a Humor Times patron via Patreon.com! Argus is regularly quoted by daily newspapers including The San Francisco Chronicle and the Los Angeles Times, by weekly business papers including the Orange County Business Journal, by Time magazine and by radio personalities including Paul Harvey. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. Oklahoma Speakers is a speakers bureau that specializes in helping meeting planners, corporations, and associations locate, select, and confirm the best speakers, entertainers and other talent for their events and meetings. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. NBC's broadcast of the Summer Olympics in Japan began to draw bigger TV ratings this week as the public became familiar with some of the athletes. Meet Argus Hamilton, the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." The Canadian Snowbird Association reported that the state of Arizona gets a million Canadian visitors every year during the winter. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. "Let's see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that." The Treasury Department released Congressional Budget Office statistics revealing that federal revenue this year will top $4 trillion dollars, mostly from income taxes and payroll taxes. By Argus Hamilton Published August 4, 2021 The White House didn't comment Monday on why President Biden was not invited to Barack Obama's sixtieth birthday party. Help us keep the lights on with a small (or large!) Argus' daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, including the Humor Times, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Records show most lottery winners go through their winnings in five years. Travel and Leisure forecast that 47% of Americans will travel this month for winter vacations and for Christmas and holiday celebrations with family. By allowing ads to appear on this site, you support the local businesses who, in turn, support great journalism. China assured Taiwan they were just weather warships. Friday, April 23, 2010 Argus Hamilton's column for 4-23-10 Hamilton: Murdochs much-younger fiance calls off wedding; he must have passed physical, Hamilton: Male crash dummies are too proud to ask for directions. Help us keep the lights on with a small (or large!) Smaller Twinkies seen as un-American Hostess Twinkies returned Tuesday but the new Twinkies weigh less and have less calories than old Twinkies. Hamilton: Is WalMart planning to invade Costco? He has responded to accusations he gave unwanted hugs the same way he'd answer if accused of beheading a movie studio owner's horse. At. Who is Argus Hamilton, and why is everybody quoting him? sustaining monthly donation. White House spokesman John Kirby offhandedly revealed that a second approaching object was quickly shot down out of the sky over Alaska Friday. I would like to join the exclusive Laugh Factory Members Club. Its noteworthy that Colonel Sanders never stored his secret blend of 11 herbs and spices in a garage. Donald Trump faces possible indictment in New York today for a hush money payment to the porn star. Meet the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." This does show that billionaire womanizers always get the first draft pick. He said Italians are emotional people who like to express themselves physically. This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. Senior Living reports retirement communities in Palm Springs now offer Baby Boomers enclosed gated neighborhoods with golf courses, pools, tennis courts, clubhouses with billiard rooms, gyms and card rooms. Copyright 2023 All American Speakers Bureau. North Korea's dictator Kim Jung Un was on hand for the launch of two intercontinental ballistic missiles Sunday which were to prove he could attack the United States. Its an election year and you cant be discriminating against popular businesses.President Obama met NAFTA leaders at the White House Monday.Afterwards they spoke to reporters. When all the guys my age were back in high school, we fantasized about having sex with Raquel Welch. When hes in Los Angeles, he can be seen working out the latest material nightly at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. Les municipalits ont tenu profiter d'un moment de rpit dans la crise sanitaire pour clbrer la fte Nationale. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. I read about it in a Conde Nast tourism article, Two Reasons to Visit Seattle. Across the Street Courier Cooks Neighbors Puzzles Real Estate Top Jobs. Hamilton: Do you know all the letters of the alphabet? The Daily Mail says Google CEO Larry Page is on a private island in the Fijis until the virus ends. Find Property for sale in Cagnes-sur-Mer, Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur. The very possibility of a shutdown raised alarms in Washington. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Umbrella-gate & More! 63,852 used cars for sale from Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur. Then they took off and soared to $22,000 per card. My direct ancestor Lord James Hamilton founded Northern Ireland for King James I in 1606 and flooded County Ulster with British Protestants. Britain reports the Delta variant's toll on Britons was much milder than expected as infection rates fell for the seventh day in a row. All Rights Reserved. Call us to speak with a booking agent to discuss your event or specific speaker request. Hamilton: Anheuser-Busch regrets its costly Bud Light move? The demonstration was amazing. Hes a loyal Democrat. Who is Argus Hamilton, and why is everybody quoting him? Hamilton: Buzz Aldrin gets married at 93; honeymooning at Viagra Falls? Oklahoma Hypnotist, Ventriloquist, Announcer & "Voice of OETA" Featured on "Good Morning America" and in TIME magazine Known as Darci Farmer's Long Time Coach (the Hit Sensation Seen on America's Got Talent), Former ABC War Correspondent; CNN's Former Chief Terrorism Correspondent Recently Embedded in Iraq & Afghanistan with ABC Subject of the ABC documentary film "The Hornet's Nest" (released 2014), Motivational Speaker and Author Customer Experience Expert Customer Service Speaker and Author. Meet the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom. Argus Hamiltons daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Now Biden wants to issue his own trading card, but he's terrified they'll put his career stats on the back of the card. Related Tags: Information on keynote speaking engagements, personal appearances, corporate entertainment and appearance fees for Argus Hamilton, an inspirational motivational speaker. Argus Hamilton Request a Quote Column Seen in the Daily Oklahoman for Two Decades Official Comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial Speaker Fees Keynote: $12,500 Travel Fees US: Round-trip airfare and expenses. Argus Hamilton on the News: iPad Air & much more! All the trans-genders in the Games have given little girls who want to grow up to achieve Olympic stardom a new motto to live by. The Walt Disney Company released the trailer for the upcoming action adventure Peter Pan and Wendy based on J.M. A taxing Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day. The owners of the medals have notified the police. Be the first to receive new merch items! Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Portage Daily Register; Reedsburg Times-Press; AAE Named to Inc. Best Workplaces in 2022. Argus Hamilton performs at corporate, political and charity events around the country. Mitt Romneys dad was an auto executive and cars and oil go hand-in-hand like solar panels and bankruptcy.House Republicans will propose tax deductions for small busines on Tax Day. Fox News cited an intelligence report Thursday saying UFO sightings have surged in the past two years in the U.S. CNN, NBC and ABC reported there were 400 sightings of UFOs in the U.S. last week. Argus Hamilton's bio posted by Susan Shelley @ 2:39 AM The Weather Channel reported a winter storm crossed the nation Wednesday as blizzards buried the Midwest and hailstorms pounded the South. Contact an All American Speakers Bureau booking agent for more information on Argus Hamilton speaking fees, availability, speech topics and cost to hire for your next live or virtual event. The president sees an opening here. Receive no obligation help from us today. In their new ad campaign, Carnival promises to treat you like Read more, In the news, Cyprus agreed to seize ten percent of the money in high-level Cyprus bank accounts to avoid bankruptcy. Barneys Beanery owner Lauren Taines offered me a dinner for being the last bar I drank at before getting sober Nov. 3, 1986. But opting out of some of these cookies may have an effect on your browsing experience. Argus Hamilton on the News: Porn Hub Offers to Help Fix Obamacare Site. Hamilton: Two old guys in the theater balcony? Please join them, and help support independent media! Check out new hilarious editorial cartoons page, updated daily! The Hollywood Reporter said Sundays Grammy Awards on CBS drew very low ratings, with the post-show buzz centered on revulsion over a devil-worship number and Madonnas plastic surgery. The World Cup in the Persian Gulf kingdom of Qatar drew universal praise for the host country for how well the crowds behaved. GOP Senator Lindsay Graham of South Carolina came down with coronavirus Monday even though he'd been already vaccinated months ago. language, country and your other public info. This year Bill Murray was in Florida telling cameras here we are at Tom Bradys retirement again. There are currently 157 luxury homes for sale in Cagnes-sur-Mer, Provence-Alpes-Cte d'Azur on JamesEdition. Argus is regularly quoted by daily newspapers including the San Francisco Chronicle, the Los Angeles Times and the Seattle Times, by weekly business papers including the Orange County Business Journal, by Time magazine, by sports columnists around the country, and by radio hosts who took a cue from the late Paul Harvey, one of Argus longtime fans and admirers. In a nod to Holy Week, MSNBC crucifies Trump every morning and every afternoon Fox News raises him from the dead. "I'm an English Monarchist and a Southern secessionist," Argus jokes. Yesterday in Beverly Hills I got out of a traffic ticket by pretending that Im woke. We'll never post to Facebook without your permission We will access Facebook to get and use your email address, With all the Fentanyl out there, who needs to play Russian Roulette nowadays? Anheuser-Busch courted customer outrage and boycott by celebrating Transgender Rights Day by placing transgender woman activist Dylan Mulvaneys image on Bud Light beer cans Pope Francis hosts Good Friday services in Rome today for Roman Catholics worldwide. Everyone agrees he needs at least three more concussions to be as funny as Terry Bradshaw. Thank you for supporting Argus and his column! A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. 3 talking about this. Comedian and nationally syndicated columnist Argus Hamilton entertains at corporate events and meetings around the country. Things even out. Check out new hilarious editorial cartoons page, updated daily! Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts stepped in Monday and gave Title 42 a chance to stop the invasion of illegal immigrants and deadly drugs pouring across the border. When he's in Los Angeles, he can be seen working out the latest material nightly at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. U.S. Olympic athletes inspired debates on cable news Monday on whether they represent the U.S. or themselves at the Games, and I'd say they represent us all. Argus was honored by Oklahoma Governor Brad Henry as the official comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial and appeared with the governor in the 2007 Tournament of Roses Parade. The official Facebook page of comedian, talk show host, and writer Argus Hamilton. <style> body { -ms-overflow-style: scrollbar; overflow-y: scroll; overscroll-behavior-y: none; } .errorContainer { background-color: #FFF; color: #0F1419; max-width . By supporting creators you love on Patreon, you're becoming an active participant in their creative process. Read more, In the news, Bill Clinton hosts the annual Bob Hope Desert Classic in Palm Springs all week. In Los Angeles Read more, Paula Deen & the N-word and much more Paula Deen said she uses the N-word when joking and suggested that black waiters dress like slaves. Governor Cuomo was questioned for hours over sex harassment charges. Hunter's love child is only two years old and already she's on the USC rowing team. Hollywood legendary movie star Raquel Welch died after a short illness in L.A. Wednesday at age eighty-two. The St. Louis Post Dispatch said Anheuser-Busch executives met with beer distributors to assure them all marketing from now on will be vetted from the top. Its the most liberal court in America. The cop asked me why I ran through a red light and I told him its 2023, I dont see color. Prescott Interior Designs of Atlanta told Yahoo News people should change their toilet seats every five years. Political Column syndicated in 180 newspapers across the US daily Official Comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial Fee Range $7,500 - $10,000 Traveling From Oklahoma and California Meet Argus Hamilton, the funniest topical comedian in America, the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." Get access to a fantastic community of comedy fans! The billionaire is off the grid along with staff including his yacht captain and crew, his science advisor and several women. Please Note: All American Speakers Bureau is a full-service talent booking agency providing information on booking Argus Hamilton for speaking engagements, personal appearances and corporate events. Madonna blamed ageism and sexism President Biden will deliver his State of the Union tonight before a joint session of the House and Senate gathered in the House Chamber in the U.S. Capitol. However last week in L.A., I. Polls say it would end up being Biden then age 82 vs. Donald Trump then age 78. Let's see what our Doctors of the Soul have to say. Hamilton: What happened to presidential quality control? "Let's see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that." To back President Obamas gun control measures Read more, The news, as one twisted mind sees it In the news, McDonalds announced a huge increase in sales in November after its first-ever drop in October. Editorials Letters Columns Rants & Raves. The Hollywood Bowl was jam-packed Saturday night with movie stars, and longtime friends and music fans to pay tribute to the great Willie Nelson on his 90th birthday. Laugh Factory Inc., 8001 Sunset Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90046. See our Privacy Policy. The court ruled that its discriminatory to make only the white and Asian high school students do their homework.Apple was reported Monday to be using college interns who work for free in Apples Chinese assembly factories. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Twinkies, Royal Babies & More, Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Paula Deen & Much More. "I'm an English Monarchist and a Southern secessionist," Argus says. It was reported Tuesday that Las Vegas hotels on the Strip were having a real cannabis problem. Donald Trumps indictment was ripped by conservative legal experts Friday and glorified by pundits on the Left. Comedian and nationally syndicated columnist Argus Hamilton entertains at corporate events and meetings around the country. The difference is President Biden twice last week indicated that he is planning to announce that hes running for re-election for president soon. Get access to a bi-monthly live Q&A with Argus (and sometimes a special guest!). Argus' daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, including the Humor Times, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. "What I would tell my fellow alcoholics and drug addicts is the biggest surprise I ever got is that recovery is more fun than partying. Copyright Notice: This website is protected by U.S. and International copyright laws. Hamilton: Did Madonna get stung by a bee? Supermarket News reports shortages of tinned fish, and lettuce, dwindling beef supplies, and even a champagne shortage, along with the egg shortage causing poultry products to skyrocket. A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. The Centers for Disease Control reported a massive outbreak of bird flu in the United States has left 47 million chickens dead or dying, resulting in shortages. A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. Argus was honored by Oklahoma Governor Brad Henry as the official comedian of the Oklahoma Centennial and appeared with the governor in the 2007 Tournament of Roses Parade. Billboard quoted Cardi B denouncing the soaring price of groceries in Los Angeles supermarkets Tuesday, prompting economists to say her quote shows inflation is beginning to hit the rich. They just made it into the ocean. Argus comments on Medicare, Duck Dynasty, Francoise Hollande and more. Search for real estate and find the latest listings of Cagnes-sur-Mer Property for sale. It was a challenge for the legendary golfer. Argus performs at corporate, political and charity events around the country. Who is Argus Hamilton, and why is everybody quoting him? The next day he got a nice card from Nancy Pelosi urging him to stay positive. Its always my richest crowd of the year. Simone showed tremendous courage by stepping down from the very top because her mental state isn't quite right. If he keeps quoting Southern segregationists he could wind up receiving the GOP nomination at a brokered convention.Oregon sociology professor Kari Norgard made world news Monday likening climate change doubters to Southern racists and slavery apologists. You just select one of the six lines on the table. Its so sad.If PGA golfers would just tee it up in the rough every now and then when nobodys looking, they might get it out of their system.Californias Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals upheld the state ban on affirmative action in college admissions Monday. Lets face it. Here's part four of our annual look at the Year in Jokes. Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: Miley Cyrus and Much More! Argus Hamilton, Southern Man of Taste The Comedy Store Podcast Stand-Up Argus has seen it all and today he shares a couple of stories in which the felonies that were committed have passed the statute of limitations for prosecution in the great state of California. It spooked even Big Bank customers like me. He must have passed the physical. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Argus Hamilton on the News: Toronto Mayor, Obamacare & More! Argus Hamilton on the News: Medicare, Duck Dynasty & Much More! It costs $6 million for a 30-second commercial. Argus Hamilton on the News: Carnival Cruise No Carnival, Argus Hamilton on the News: Cyprus, Lohan and Much More, Fun With The News: Carnival Cruise Liner & More, Argus Has Fun With The News: Donald Trump & More, Fun With The News: Pot Legalization & More, Argus Has Fun with the News: Sex-Texting & More. The UN News reported Tuesday that plastic pollution in the world's oceans is expected to double by 2030. Argus Hamilton's daily column of jokes on the news, now carried in over 100 newspapers across the United States, is also read and heard by millions on the Internet and on radio stations across the country. Hamilton: Still counting Super Bowl points in Arizona. Argus Hamilton's humor column, now in its second decade, appears five days a week on the Internet and in over 100 newspapers across the U.S. Last night during the Games, the Americans took the Gold Silver and Bronze medals. Ask Argus anything you want to know or ask Argus his advice about comedy, writing, Hollywood, etc. Copyright 1979 - 2022. Be the first on your block to get the new Humor Times t-shirt!! Bookmark the page and share it! Contact an All American Speakers Bureau booking agent for more information on Argus Hamilton speaking fees, availability, speech topics and cost to hire for your next live or virtual event. A proud graduate of the University of Oklahoma and now based in Los Angeles, Argus brings an unusual perspective to the news from Washington and around the country. They said it shows that in the past World Cups it was the gays who caused all the trouble. Shes going by the book. Read more, Miley Cyrus, George Clooney, Obamacare and much more Miley Cyrus and her boyfriend Liam Hemsworth reportedly broke up Monday due to her raunchy MTV Awards performance. President Biden gleefully mocked Donald Trump Friday for issuing a limited set of trading cards as NFT for $99 on the crypto market. The U.S. government on Thursday allowed Taiwan to purchase F-16s from Lockheed Martin and missiles from Raytheon, in a grand day for the defense industry. Hamilton: In those Super Bowl ads, its about what sells beer. Tiger Woods is favored to win the Masters for the first. Fox News 92-year-old CEO Rupert Murdoch ordered Tucker Carlson fired, causing Fox stock to crash $980 million in value Monday, three days after he paid Dominion $787 million to settle a libel lawsuit. They say that life imitates art but more often it imitates Gilligan's Island. All American Entertainment Named to Inc. Best Workplaces in 2022. The food went rancid Read more, The news according to Argus! Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: From A-Rod to Carlos Danger, Argus Hamilton Comments on the News: The Royal Baby & Much More. Argus Hamilton admits he's not the type of guy to do something that's no fun. The Publicists Manual states that in order to stay in the news, you scream racism for three days and then you develop a cocaine problem and get arrested on Sunset Boulevard.ARGUS HAMILTON, GB, Albert departments battle two structure fires Monday, Council OKs resolutions for Zarah loft project, Local volunteers strive to include girls in youth soccer, Bernard (Barney) John Kruse 1952 - 2023. However the bar is set pretty high for Brady. This Christmas, Kanye West will be going from house to house to make your drunk uncle seem OK. As we share our homes with relatives and loved ones, we are reminded of that first Christmas scene. [5] His specialty was to make funny comments on the news of the day. Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. Submit your best content, jokes, photos, or videos to become an exclusive Laugh Factory member and have your content shared on our website. Hamilton: Latest object shot out of sky shaped like Corvette? Argus James Hamilton III is the son, grandson and great-grandson of Methodist ministers in the South. When Americans turned on their TVs and saw Steven Harper standing at a podium in the Rose Garden, everybody thought for a moment itd all been a bad dream.President Obama predicted the Supreme Court will not overturn ObamaCare. Hamilton: Argus responsible for pandemic; he didnt send email to 10 people, Hamilton: Southwest flight is booked for Jan. 5th or 6th or 7th, Hamilton: Even the signs are private in La Jolla, Hamilton: Harry and Meghan insist in millionth interview they just want privacy, Hamilton: The Fourth Wiseman brought a fruitcake. [2] [3] [4] Hamilton began his stand-up comedy career at The Comedy Store. Any debate between Trump and Biden should be held in the balcony of the Muppet Theater. Fox News interviewed House Republicans who demand to learn all that's on Hunter Biden's laptop, suspecting it'll reveal shady business deals with his father and uncle. The Read more, On the royal baby, Detroit bankruptcy, immigration, and many more hilarious subjects! The Comedy Store is sending me down to San Diego on New Years Eve to perform at the Comedy Store La Jolla on its 45th anniversary. You may have a drinking problem if you drink stuff that not only hits the spot, but also removes it. Argus on Countdown with Keith Olbermann. Out of these cookies, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are as essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. And to cap it off, Ruperts much-younger fiance just called off the marriage. The Super Bowl is played today between the Philadelphia Eagles and Kansas City Chiefs at State Farm Stadium in Phoenix. Argus Hamilton is the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." Reproduction and distribution of content, with or without modification, without written permission of Laugh Factory Inc., is prohibited. Not just muppets Hamilton: ATM in the gym lobby is best machine to impress the women, Hamilton: Bud Light has always been trans its water that identifies as beer, Hamilton: I found nuclear launch codes in a fortune cookie, Hamilton: MSNBC crucifies Trump every morning, Fox raises him from the dead, Hamilton: The Founding Fathers would be on the FBI watch list today, Hamilton: Payoffs, hush money show Trump knows how to negotiate, Hamilton: Settling for Partly Cloudy Daniels, Hamilton: Alliance aligns with March Madness bracket picks, Hamilton: Not everybody can be Irish; somebody has to drive, Hamilton: Vodka mixes well with everything but decisions, Hamilton: Tax refund will pay for that dozen eggs, Hamilton: Money left in your bank account after taxes is an IRS red flag, Hamilton: Tinker Bell has new sister in latest movie, Hamilton: Life in prison is diminishing deterrent for the aging, Hamilton: This candidate gets you four presidents in one, Uncle Sams tall hat handy when its being passed around, Hamilton: Look how much I still owe to Ukraine, Hamilton: Prez shoots down balloon angioplasty idea out of habit. Commentary. And it was shot down for good reason. We are here to help! Copyright 1979 - 2022. I compare the voting rights bill to Jussie . Porn Hub offered to help the White House fix the ObamaCare website Tuesday. Argus Hamilton is the man Robin Williams once called "the Will Rogers of the Baby Boom." "Let's see Rush Limbaugh get to the right of that.". You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. There are Read more, In the news, General Petraeus agreed to face Congress to discuss the Benghazi attack and his sex scandal. The Irish Catholic president saw Protestant Belfast, toured castles in Ireland that were owned by English lords and he met with Englands prime minister who is Pakistani. It is available for print and websites through ExtremeInk.com.
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